 Photo by Johannes Plenio on Unsplash Dear Fellow Travellers, October marks the end of the pagan year and for many of us a time of personal transformation, whether in the spiritual or earthly realms. This is literally true for me. Twenty-two years ago this month, I gave birth to my first daughter. Looking back, I know that my baby wasn’t supposed to arrive that night; she was due a full week later. So, due to a series of unnecessary medical interventions and possibly - I’ll say it - incompetence or laziness on the part of the medical team, after almost 30 hours, I had to have an emergency C-section. Fortunately, my daughter was healthy, but it took her three days to open her eyes. This confirmed that she wasn’t ready to be in the big world quite yet. I felt guilty about that for a long time, afraid that I hurt her deeply. I am still saddened by knowing that my first feeling about being a mother was that I was a failure. I know I’m not alone in this. Looking back, I can see that I felt like I didn’t know anything about what was happening to me. I didn’t trust myself, but I also had major apprehensions about the strict Western medical process that came to define my pregnancy. I didn’t admit these things to myself at the time, though, and I didn’t have anyone to admit it to, anyway. I had no spiritual or emotional support; I had some physical support but not what I deeply needed. I didn’t even know what to ask for. Many years later, my beloved grandmother told me she had never seen a woman so run down after giving birth - and that’s saying a lot. I was the ghost of myself, she didn’t recognize me and worried. It took me a long time to recuperate. It took me a long time to make peace with the idea that I forced my daughter into the world when she wasn’t ready. It took me a long time to forgive myself for not knowing what I didn’t know and to receive the wave of unconditional love of the Divine. Once I did, I was able to forgive myself for not knowing what I didn’t know. I accepted that I didn’t have support, I didn’t know how to be a support for myself, and that I didn’t know what I needed and couldn’t ask for it. My daughter may have suffered the slings and arrows of a new mother in over her head, but she is a vibrant, wonderful young woman now and we are close. It was a hard journey, but we’re all okay now. There’s no need to carry guilt; I know I did my best every day, even if it wasn’t perfect. Looking back, I realize that part of my barrier was reluctance. Reluctance to speak up, to ask for help even if I didn’t know what I needed, exactly. In this time of harvesting, we have an opportunity to receive mindfully. Giving and receiving is the natural, virtuous cycle and yet I know that many of us resist receiving. As women, we learned to give and give, and although it’s true that when we give we also receive, it cannot be the only way we can receive. When we receive gracefully with an open heart, we also give. “Until we can receive with an open heart, we can never really give with an open heart.” – Brene Brown Sometimes, we are in a space where we need to receive more than we give.
I would like to share with you some inquiries:
I invite you to receive gracefully and mindfully with an open heart. Yes, it feels vulnerable but trust me that it has the power to deepen your relationships. Honor the person who gives to you: look them in the eyes and say thank you for the specific gift, but mostly for what’s behind it: generosity, love, selfless concern for you, and deep care. Receive my love to you, Evelyne
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 Fortunately, I found beauty where I moved. It's a balm on my heart. Here's a reflection on my most recent move across many states, in the middle of a pandemic, when my oldest stayed behind to finish University, and when my baby flew off the nest to go to University in another country. It’s a choice I made: moving away from many beloveds friends
and a magical healing place. Can’t really complain. But I can feel the feels. The heartbreaks of all the losses. The anger that the vision I had of what my life would be can’t be... at least not anytime soon. The fears and worries because my daughters are on their own and I have little access to them. I saw that coming. It’s here now. Very different in reality. The anxiety of having to find a doctor/dentist/mechanic/chiropractor/.../ that are in alignment or at least respectful of my values and principles. The frustration of not feeling excited by our new town. AND It’s a choice I made. Means I can make choices. Which one will I make today? See with new eyes? Be curious and wonder? Dare to dream again? New dreams? Dreams I’ve never dream before? Reinvent myself again? Who am I? Who do I want to be? What am I committing to cause and create? A choice I don’t have is that I bring myself everywhere I go. Fortunately I’m resilient. I’m hopeful. I don’t give up. I’m a dreamer. A visionary. I’m a creator. I’m an intentional creator. I’m a powerful intentional creator! I’m a freaking powerful intentional creator! I mourn. I appreciate. I love. That’s what starting all over again is for me this time. To all the women out there who are still trying to figure out what is expected of them, Who are bending themselves into incredible uncomfortable shapes to try to fit in, To conform, To be accepted, To feel like they belong, Who are feeling like no matter what they do or say they will never be enough… I say: Come home! Come to your own self, to the essence of YOU! To all the women who are lost, Who don’t know who they are anymore, Who are in transition, at the crossroads. Where what was doesn’t work anymore and what will be is not clear yet… I say: You are exactly where you are supposed to be in this moment. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and feel your heart beat. To all the women experiencing intense grief for the lost dreams, The lost years of saying no to themselves constantly while saying yes to everyone and everything else, And for the loss of your people … I say, let yourself be held by Mother Earth, She knows what grief feels like. To all the women who are holding themselves back for fear of ruffling any feathers, To not shake the boat, to not make the people around them uncomfortable… I say STOP! Create the waves and surf on them! Hiding time is over! Your color and your own unique texture are essential in the weaving of the grand tapestry of life! To all the women who are waiting, Waiting for things to happen, Waiting for dreams to manifest, For things to change, For people to show up, For kids to grow up before doing something for themselves, I ask: What can you DO now that will move you toward THE life you want to live? Sometime, waiting is what is needed, But many times waiting is what makes you go down the rabbit hole. You’ve done the best that you could! Remember that you benefited from the choices you made, and it worked for a while. It’s ok if it doesn’t work anymore. I invite you to allow the change, Allow yourself to grow into your own self. Feel the call of your soul emerging. I bet that you’ve been hearing it for a while. It might be time to say yes to it! Remember the power that lies within you… The power to create a fulfilling and exciting life, The power to not know and be at peace with that, The power of your intuition, your inner guidance, The power of all the women before you and the ones that are coming… You have great power sister! Do not shy away from it… it might scare you… I hear you… It’s ok… You can learn how to be with it, You can learn what it feels like to embody it, To give language and image to it. In the next few days, ask yourself: What is my next step? And be aware of what you hear, What you read, What comes to your awareness. DO NOT dismiss a message or a sign thinking “Oh it’s just a coincidence”. You’ve asked for answers, they will come. Then, get wild and take one action inspired by the answers!  Do you need a sign? Here’s my favorite technique to receive guidance from my invisible teammates.2/25/2019  Are you facing a crossroad? Have you been considering a couple of choices and both seem to be good for you but you need to make a move and don’t know which way to go? Are you afraid to make a mistake and choose the wrong option? First of all, consider this: What if you couldn’t make a mistake? As an Intentional Creativity® facilitator, one of the powerful teachings I share with my clients is that there is nothing you can do wrong. You can’t choose the wrong color, the wrong paintbrush, and you can’t paint the wrong strokes. True that your inner critic will try to convince you otherwise, doesn’t mean it’s right. By "trying on" this new way of operating, you learn to quiet down the Inner Critic and turn your attention to your Inner Compass to receive guidance. Practicing accepting that you can’t make a wrong choice in front of the canvas helps you build your trust muscle and strengthen your capacity to see new perspectives which you then bring in your every day life. Second, if you believe that you have a large invisible team of beings ready to offer support, you can ask them for specific signs to help you in your decision making. I’ve used this technique many times and when I had the courage to follow through, I haven’t been disappointed. The special trick to this technique is that it needs to be specific. Ask to see something specific that you wouldn’t expect to see and within a time frame. For example, my daughter was hesitating between 2 majors in College. She felt that she was receiving signs that guided her both ways, but she had to make a choice. So I taught her this technique. 1- She got clear on the life she wanted to experience after College, 2- She chose a specific sign: a butterfly, 3- Within a timeframe: 24 hours 4- Meaning: Seeing a butterfly within 24 hours would mean that option A would be the most in alignment with who she is and her dream for her life after College. And it had to come from her… not me pointing out the butterfly to her 😉 And just to be clear, we were on a 12 hour road trip in the middle of winter in Canada so the chances to see a butterfly were zero to none. Well, within 4 hours, she was watching Netflix on her phone when she saw 2 butterflies on the wallpaper in the background of the scene. And after that, it was a butterfly sign after the other. She said she’s never seen that many butterflies in such a short period of time, not even in the summer. She had her answer. She changed her major and she is sooooo happy she did. She feels so much better and she is so enthusiastic with the possibilities. If you think that you see the signs because you’ve asked for it and therefore your awareness is just heightened to see these things specifically, I can tell you that often, when I desperately wanted to see the sign I was asking for, I didn’t see any. I was looking hard but it just wasn’t the time to choose that option. If you don't receive the sign that confirms option A, try the same technique to see if option B is the best choice. If you don't see signs that confirm Option B as a good option, maybe it's time to explore other avenues and wonder about new possibilities. I have some tips to do so but it will be for another post. Try out this technique and let me know about your experience, I would love to hear!  Being aware of your thoughts and feelings is empowering, but even if you live your life aware and awake, you still get stuck in old stories, fears, and self-doubts once in a while. The gift is that now you know what is going on. However, sometimes, it's more difficult than others to shift your inner conversation on your own. That’s why it’s crucial to have a couple of people who you can turn to, to whom you can freely ask what you need at that moment. Sometimes, they can just be a space where you can be sad, where you are heard and witnessed. Sometimes, they can help you remember who you really are and what you are up to. Sometimes, they can help you to see a new perspective on a given situation. I invite you to assess who is on your team to shift your energy faster.  Then, contact them and create the space between you two where you commit to ask for what you need and to be there to empower each other. It’s an opportunity to create a new kind of relationship with yourself and these special friends. Share about your intention and what you want to create with them. By doing this, you then become the deliberate creator of your life.
If no one around you can fulfill your need of an empowering teammate, call one into your life. Use the Universe to support you in attracting the person you need. While that person is preparing to come into your life, do what's in this blog post: What to Do While the Universe is Orchestrating the Manifestation of Your Dreams? You don’t need to dwell in the mud. There is nothing wrong with asking for a hand… on the contrary, it is grand! One of the most important and difficult step in the creation process is to allow what you are calling forth to manifest in physical reality. Sometimes, it takes time!!! On that step, after visioning, after generating the feelings, you need to allow and release control. So what do you do while the Universe is conspiring and orchestrating behind the scene all that needs to happen for what you asked for to come through and to be for the best of everyone concerned? PLAY! Cultivate joy! Laugh! Wonder! Dance! Paint! Do what makes you happy!  See and feel the wonder of life surrounding you! Be curious, try new things and all along KNOW deep down that it's coming. It takes time and energy to bring into physical matter thoughts and dreams from the ethereal. I remember, when I was 16, in my English class (remember, I am French Canadian), I envisioned myself being surrounded with palm trees, in the desert speaking English fluently. It made me wonder about the purpose of these English classes… it was so hard for me… the language just didn’t click for me until… yep, you guessed it, when I was 32, I moved to Phoenix, AZ. I saw it, I felt it, I made it happen. It took 16 years but who was counting? I didn’t spend 16 years being frustrated because it wasn’t here yet. I just knew it would happen and I was curious how it would unfold. I invite you to stay curious and to keep KNOWING in your bones that it's on its way. In the meantime… play!!! Enjoy the adventure of life. Keep learning about yourself, about how you function in the world, about how and what you think. Believe and be self-aware enough to make the inspired adjustments to your thoughts, feelings, as well as your capacity to receive to make sure that you actually let it in when it comes into your life!  Are you someone who need to make lists and plan for months before going on a trip or while working toward a dream? Are you trying to be FULLY equipped and ready to take on EVERY possible challenge that MIGHT show up? If so, you might find yourself feeling stuck in the planning and packing and never go where you want to go and do what you want to do. You might also feel that a paralyzing fear of not being ready or missing something or of the unknown.  Maybe you are someone who packs light and is ready to go at any time on the new adventure calling, the new shining thing/opportunity presenting itself. You are curious and might be addicted to adrenaline or the excitement of the new beginning. If so, you might get lost along the way, finding the shiny new beginning not so shiny anymore and losing interest. You might start wondering why you are going where you are going and doing what you are doing and then follow the next shiny opportunity which makes you spread yourself thin and forget about who you are and what you are about.  Or are you the kind of adventurer that regularly checks with your inner compass to see not only which journey is calling but to see which path is yours to step on? You pack what you need as well as your gifts and talents because you know what they are. You know about the mystery, and the unknown and you also know that you are not alone, you have access to guidance and you always have your inner compass to refer to when you feel lost. So what kind of adventurer are you? Personally, I am a little bit of all of them, I travel on the path, then I go on the side looking in, wondering if the path is right, doubting, feeling not enough. My fear of not being enough makes me take classes after classes to know more, to be better, it also makes me hold back and stay in my comfort zone. It makes me not step fully on the path but walking very alertly and on the side of the path looking in. I am also very attracted to anything shiny and glittery so I can get easily distracted. But then, when I connect with my inner guidance, my fire gets awakened ,and I am back on the path trusting, witnessing the synchronicity, being grounded and open to new insights, new perspective,s and magic. It feels pretty darn good there! Honestly, knowing yourself is immensely helpful. Knowing how you think, what stories are operating in the background that influence the decisions you make, the actions you take, and how you show up in the world is invaluable when living an intentional life. My next questions for you are: Are you the adventurer you would like to be?
If not, what needs to change? What do you need to put in place to become that adventurer? What has been calling you to bring into reality? What have you been putting off that is time to feed, nurture, and give space for? What is ready to be birthed through you? Or maybe, you have been on your path but feeling stuck and you don’t feel the fire you once felt? Hopefully, this article will help you get to the next step of your journey. January is such a great symbolic time representing a new beginning, new possibility, and new potential. It’s that time of year… at least in the north when the pace slows down so you have time to do some dreaming and visioning, to take a breath and assess where you are, where you want to go and make a plan to make it happen. It’s a time to make some adjustments if you’ve been walking on your path but are feeling down… what do you need to do to rekindle the spark? Here are a few steps to help you get started on your journey or reconnected to your calling: Step 1 Vision into the future. What does your amazing future self do five years from now? One year from now?
Step 2 Remember to feel As often as possible, reconnect with the feelings of your fulfilled future self, bring them into your present. By doing that you are letting the future create your present… isn't it an interesting paradox: The future creates the present AND the present creates the future. It's both! Step 3 Break it down into steps Write down your vision and break it down into daily steps… you could totally keep connecting with your awesome future self in order to receive the steps from her. Or you could be really practical and do some reverse engineering with your vision:  Step 4 Use a tool that will help you stay focus. This year, I am trying a focus planner… so far it’s very helpful keeping me on track. You could also create a group of people where you meet every other week or every month and you keep each other accountable. I personally use a focus planner and it is so helpful to me to stay focus. I have a tendency to lose focus and go from one thing to the other. I want this year to be different… I want to try a new way of being: Laser Focused! We'll see how it goes! Step 5 Create your own Vision Board It will energetically support your creative process of bringing into your reality the life you want to live, the life that your future self is already living! Here's one of mine from some years ago. If you are not sure how to make a vision board, do a search online, it's easy. It can also be very fun to gather with friends or your family and enjoy a couple hours of dreaming, laughing, and creating!  Step 6 Keep breathing
Do not forget to keep breathing along the way, be aware of the parts of you that want to keep you small, in fear, and stay where you are. Talk to these parts of you, redirect your attention to the empowered parts, towards your future self who is already living that wonderful life! If you are curious about why using your future self as a partner is powerful, look into my online course. It doesn’t involve painting and I explain the principles behind this method.
Start your year with a bang! Let's make this year about taking action! One thing I have been noticing these past few months is that it's time more than ever, for us women to share our wisdom and work toward our dreams.
It's time to step outside the box, to stop being people-pleasers and to speak up, to say no to what is draining and yes to what is honoring of our time, body, mind, and wisdom. It's time to trust our intuition, to fiercely cultivate joy, to make peace with money, and to receive abundance. 
What kind of action is needed from you at this point in time? What project or dream is asking for your attention? What is waking you up at night wanting to be created? Do you find yourself ignoring your heart's calling? STOP! RIGHT NOW! Instead, nurture it! Feed it! Bring it into reality! Even if it doesn't seem reasonable! Especially if it doesn't seem reasonable! What have you been called to create? A new business? A new relationship to your body? A non-profit organization? A trip to a sacred destination? Having more play and laughter with your partner? Are you being called to step into your artist self? Write a book? Move on a farm and live off the grid? Open your restaurant or a retreat center or a bed and breakfast? No matter what it is, I want you to be actively creating it and I can help you kick start your adventure! I know what it takes to make your vision become a reality. It takes dedication, perseverance, redirecting the voice of the critic, and getting back up when life happens even when doubts and fears arise. It's not easy to do this by yourself, we need our tribe, our teammates, the people that won't come down with us but who will remind us of how powerful and courageous we are! I can be that for you! 
Let's work together! I have a special price on my coaching package available for you until February 15th! 50% off 4 hours of private coaching. That means that we meet (online or in-person) 1hr every week for 4 weeks.
Call me (480) 532-4936 or email me evelyne@coachevelyne.com to get the ball rolling! Can this be your first empowered, guided action of the year? If you are not ready for some private coaching, sign up below to have access to 12 Intentional Creativity videos that will help you get to know who you are a little better and move through fear, insecurity, and overwhelm. This painting, titled "Be the Mother" was created as I led a client through a process of releasing old wounds, disempowering stories, and embodying the more authentic self without apologies. As you can see, the painting went through dramatic changes. Similar to what we go through in life when we wake up and say: "It's enough! There is more to life, to me than how I've been living. Time to change some things!". In front of the canvas, we practice : - Letting go of expectations, - Dealing with the inner critic who can be relentless, - Listening within for inspiration and guidance, - Trusting the guidance even when we don't know where we are going, - Being in the mystery, the unknown, - Breathing through discomfort as fears and doubts arise, - Being aware of our feelings, thoughts and beliefs that arise, - Taking risks, - Wondering what wants to happen next, - Loving ourselves through it all! Here is an excerpt of what "Be the Mother" shared with me. Her message is for you as well: Be the Mother you need. I hope you integrate some of these practices into your life. If you need guidance or support, here are two options: Self-coaching: Sign up below to access 12 Intentional Creativity® videos, at no cost that provide processes to "Be the Mother" you need for yourself on your journey. Private coaching online or in-person: I have a special deal running until Feb 15th - 4 X 1hr of private coaching for the price of 2! Great opportunity if you want to integrate deeply some self-love practices into your daily life, receive powerful tools to do so, and be held in compassionate love during the process. Fill out the form below, I will be in touch with you within 24 hours. |
Evelyne VerretI am an intuitive artist, Intentional Creativity ® Coach, Color of Woman Teacher, certified law of attraction coach, wife, mom and so much more! I love all things spiritual. I believe that the questions are much more valuable than the answers and it's why I live in a constant inquiry. Welcome in my world. Get a cup of coffee and spend some time dreaming with me. Archives
October 2021
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